Skip to main content

2013 and We're Still Here

And so, because watching indie films on Netflix+ a bottle of wine + cleaning out one's closet equals a brief moment of clarity, I will finally be composing a blog entry that has been about six days in the works. As in, I wanted to say something profound regarding New Year's, but ended up not for various reasons such as:

a) writing and then realizing it was shit.
b) other people reading it and realizing it was shit (which, eff you, my resolution for this blog is to just write what's really there, sans sugar-coating)
c) being in situations where although my brain is thinking about writing, my body is physically unable to conduct such a feat at the time.

To be honest, my intentions for how to proceed with the New Year are very vague and not really itemized. Typically, I am one to take every opportunity for new beginnings, with things like my birthday becoming pinnacles for new progressions towards self-improvement and a change in attitude that will eventually make me happier. This is manifested in a literal list, written in one of my many notebooks, and of course never reflected upon again until it is too late.

This year I haven't written down a single ambition. In a culture where we typically endeavour to lose weight, make more money, find true love and harness the meaning of happiness on a year-to-year basis, I have only decided that I need to be more of me, in every way I know how. Five days in and it's already been hard, but in this brief moment of clarity, I feel (and hope) that it's just around the corner.

- T.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Purging- A L i st.

- Less Facebook posts - Less junk articles (no money to pay for extra data; see first item) - Less obsessive phone-checking (see first two items; besides, your relationship with your phone is now borderline unhealthy anyway) - Less falling asleep with the computer on (studies show this is terrible for your sleep) - Less impulsive spending - Less jaw-clenching - Less ranting about your relationship - Less taking work personally - Less photos of your face, or your cat's face (with the imperative for more photos of the world around you- for posterity and the appreciation of your life) - Less nail-painting (yikes.) - Less hair-washing (double-yikes) - Less fear of the future unknown - Less comparison of your physical appearance to others (nearly impossible) - Less dread of getting out of bed in the morning - Less wish-making at 11:11 (for wishes you are too lazy/stupid/intimidated to help make come true) - Less fidgeting while listening - Less sugar (obviously) - Less ...

2022

As a teenager, one of my biggest fears was an airborne disease that would wreak havoc on the world as we knew it.  Back then, SARS was a thing, and some other weird things that I can't remember happened that year that brought me to my naiive, self-absorbed and dysfunctional little knees one afternoon while watching CNN.  I was overwhelmed. I asked my mother why it felt like the entire world was collapsing. The drama. ...and now, look where we are. It's 2022, baby - literally any fucking thing goes. - T.

:: Wounds and Such

This post is about scars. Today, at some point, I was thinking about scars. Everyone has them. One scar is from aimlessly tumbling down a ditch in childhood. Another one on my knee was acquired from falling on ice. My favourite knee scar is comprised of three parts- 1) the long remnants of a botched incision, 2) a hole in the kneecap and 3) two little "x" shaped things above aforementioned incision. The story- at the age of fifteen, I was having the time of my life. My friends and I left school property to hang at a park. I ran and ran and laughed and laughed and rode the swing and jumped and soooooooared through the air and then landed, hard. Nothing about me has ever been the same since. They reconstructed a ligament in my right knee. I like to think the scar signifies a sort of bravery- repeated needles, an epidural, a night in a lonely hospital bed, hallucinating by way of injected morphine doses. How badass. There is a small scar on my eyelid that only *I* can notice, w...